Mess of thoughts

I really do need some fucking clearity in my life right now... Mabye some inspiration would do it but its not like you can buy inspiration treasure maps, although that would be nice. The last little while i have felt stuck, so i thought in my boredom i might aswell dig some of the past up which was a bumpy route to take. Where to go is really a difficult question sometimes and also what to do? I find myself searching for advise alot when i don't even want to hear it. I think some good deciscion making needs to be done for me to gain some momentem. Definetly time to let go of the past. Its so weird though because the past is moments of time that have gone, but it still has the power to effect your life even more then the present or future. I guess all i wanna do is take some risk cause playing life safe can really bring ya down. And its not like i am looking to go sky diving naked, i suppose i just have to stop giving so much regard to the opinions of others even if they are my friends. Well there's my update finally!! and i hope you all have sexy and spooky halloween!!